Charles on… anything that comes along

Some dim-bulb MP is calling for schools to jam the signals from mobile phones in order, he says, to stop happy slapping.

It’s hard to explain on how many levels this is sooooo stupid.

1) ‘Happy slapping’ is done by videoing the act. Jamming the radio signal for mobiles won’t stop it.
2) It mostly happens away from schools
3) People who share it don’t send it as picture or video messages, they send it by Bluetooth, which (by contrast to a message sent over the mobile network) is free and fast.

Apparently

Adrian Bailey, the Labour MP for West Bromwich West, will write this week to Schools Minister Jacqui Smith pointing out that the ability to block phone signals already exists. He will ask her to raise with mobile-phone companies, headteachers and parents’ groups the possibility of using the technology as one way of curbing the growing number of attacks in school grounds.

One hopes at least one of the mobile phone companies, headteachers and parents’ groups will have had the same thoughts and point them out in as astringent a manner as possible.

So who is this guy? (The reason he is asking these questions is because there’s been a spate of well-publicised happy slapping incidents in his constituency, so he’s trying to make it seem like he’s doing something for the local papers. I infer.) Lets see, Theyworkforyou info on Bailey:
-Very strongly for introducing foundation hospitals.
-Very strongly for introducing student top-up fees
-Very strongly for Labour’s anti-terrorism laws
-Very strongly for the Iraq war
-Quite strongly for introducing ID cards
-Very strongly for the fox hunting ban
-Very strongly for equal gay rights.

(I think that item 5 indicates further how weak his grasp of the issues where technology meets society are.)

In fact he’s already asked these questions: on 14 June (”To ask the Secretary of State for Education and Skills if she will consult mobile phone companies on the development of new technologies to block the use of mobile phones in schools“) and on the same day “To ask the Secretary of State for Education and Skills what policies are being developed to stop the bullying with mobile phones known as ‘happy slapping’ in schools“.

Answers? “There are currently no plans for the Department to begin consultation with mobile phone companies on technologies to block mobile phone use in schools” and “Happy slapping incidents may well be considered violent crimes under existing criminal law legislation, and therefore should be dealt with in the same way as other such incidents. Guidance on dealing with such incidents is available on the teachernet website and further advice to schools on violence reduction is currently being developed.
In terms of bullying by mobile phone, part of the Anti-Bullying Alliance (ABA) remit under the funding provided by the Department is to develop innovative and practical approaches to tackling bullying, including the modern menace of bullying by text messaging. Bullying by text messages on mobile phones is also referred to in our guidance pack for schools ‘Don’t suffer in Silence’.”

The latter is the Sir Humphrey way of saying “Oh, do sod off.”

One also has to ask whether nobody at the Observer could quite bring themselves to think of the objections to his harebrained “plan” before it got to print..

These posts might be related (the database thinks..):
• What is the sound of splashing water when you're deaf? (5 October 2005; score: 43.76%)
• Robert Scoble, meet happy slapping (20 July 2005; score: 42.57%)
• Featuritis vs. the Happy User Peak (1 July 2005; score: 40.79%)