Charles on… anything that comes along

We’ve got an answerphone - a BT Freestyle 2500. It’s rubbish. I don’t know how it is that BT keeps on choosing suppliers for its branded kit who are no good, but I don’t think I’ve ever come across a bit of consumer kit from BT that has surprised me with its quality and reliability.

The rubbishness of the 2500 is unlimited. It’s a cordless phone with two bases. On either phone, no matter how close you are to the base station, it sounds as though you’re already somewhere around the orbit of Saturn: gentle whooshing all the time. People say “it’s a really bad line, isn’t it?” But it isn’t. As my experience with broadband shows, it’s actually a really good line.

And I checked by plugging in an old dial phone that happened to be lurking around, to the same socket that the BT Freesyle is connected to: a pure, untroubled dial tone. No whooshing.

It’s even worse with the Freestyle when you try to liste to a message someone has left. It sounds as though they’ve left it at the bottom of our road. “Moo mmm ub oo oob ub bub oo,” it goes, and we look at each other perplexed. “Was that a number or an address?” we ask one another. It’s no good. It needs replacing.

So, your suggestions please.

(Oh, and thanks for all the suggestions on the mobile network. I think I’ll stick with Orange - who I can beat down to £10 per month and a new phone. Suits me, since there’s no way I’m lashing out for an iPhone.)

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